As a mom, building a supportive community of fellow moms is essential. It helps us navigate the ups and downs of motherhood, share parenting tips, and offer encouragement. But what happens if one of your mommy friends turns out to be a bully? Sadly, it can happen. The very person you turned to for advice or support might start making you feel less than or unfairly criticized.
Here’s what to do if you find yourself in this tricky situation:
1. Recognize the Bullying Behavior
The first step is to acknowledge that you are being bullied. Sometimes, it’s not as obvious as childhood bullying, but it can manifest in different ways. A mommy bully may:
- Constantly criticize your parenting style or decisions.
- Exclude you from gatherings.
- Spread rumors about you.
- Make passive-aggressive comments that leave you feeling hurt.
A recent article from Smart Parenting points out that emotional bullying among adults, including moms, is often subtle, but the impact is just as harmful as more overt forms of bullying .
2. Set Boundaries
Once you recognize the behavior, it’s essential to set boundaries. It’s okay to say “no” or to speak up when something makes you uncomfortable. Let your friend know, in a calm and non-confrontational way, that her words or actions are hurtful. According to a study by Rappler, setting clear boundaries is one of the most effective ways to stop bullying, even among adults .
3. Seek Support from Other Moms
Talk to other friends or moms you trust. Share your experience and see if they’ve noticed similar behavior. It’s important to lean on those who understand and can offer advice. The website Mommy Mundo highlights the importance of surrounding yourself with a positive mom tribe. Knowing that you are not alone in this situation can make a world of difference .
4. Take a Step Back
Sometimes, the best way to handle a toxic friendship is to take a step back. You don’t have to cut off your mommy friend completely, but distancing yourself may give you the space you need to regain your peace of mind. According to PsychCentral, it’s okay to take a break from someone if the relationship is draining you emotionally .
5. Prioritize Your Mental Health
Being bullied, even by another mom, can take a toll on your mental health. Take time for self-care and focus on your well-being. As Filipino moms, we often prioritize our families, but don’t forget to prioritize yourself too. The Department of Health (DOH) promotes mental health awareness through its programs, reminding us that self-care and mental well-being are key to a happy and healthy life .
6. Seek Professional Help if Needed
If the situation escalates, don’t hesitate to seek help from a professional. A licensed counselor or psychologist can provide strategies to cope with the emotional impact of bullying. The Philippine Mental Health Association (PMHA) offers counseling services and support for Filipinos dealing with stress or anxiety caused by difficult relationships .
7. Reflect and Move On
At the end of the day, not all friendships are meant to last, and that’s okay. Reflect on the situation, forgive if you can, and move on. Surround yourself with positive and supportive moms who lift you up instead of bringing you down.
Motherhood is challenging enough without the added pressure of dealing with a bullying friend. Remember that no one has the right to make you feel bad about your parenting or yourself. Stand firm, seek support, and protect your peace of mind.
Have you ever experienced a bully mommy friend? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. Let’s support one another through the highs and lows of motherhood.
Sources:
